Conversing with Others
Know yourself and from what background you come.
Some people may seem unpleasant to talk to at first, but as you spend more time with them, their wisdom becomes apparent, making the conversation more agreeable. Others may appear prudent and learned at first, but over time, they may prove to be flawed in their judgment or without foresight. Adapt your interactions based on the type of person you are dealing with. If someone’s wisdom emerges gradually, engage in fewer but longer conversations. If they are immediately prudent and learned, interact with them often but briefly, in a way that you find pleasing.
Be a rare guest, lest you become commonplace.
Consume material and engage in conversations about topics that others are passionate about, such as statues, weapons, or poetry, and praise their interests.
Avoid interacting with someone who is distracted by other matters, as they will be less attentive to you.
When interacting with those who are prone to melancholy, be serious. When dealing with those who are easily angered, be assertive and patient. This is especially important if you are in a subordinate position.
Do not put on an air of seriousness or solemnity.
When speaking with the learned or those experienced in business, be concise and avoid excessive explanations. On the contrary, when interacting with the uneducated, you may need to provide more detailed explanations.
Be mindful of the timing of your interactions, and whether they are appropriate.
Seek to befriend those who hold influence, either through their alliances or by getting in their favor by any means necessary.
Be prepared for every situation. For example, if someone challenges you with a comment in a gathering, plan a way to respond calmly with sharp words while maintaining a composed outward demeanor.
If you must speak of someone not present, avoid mentioning their name, location, or any identifying details, in case a passerby overhears and guesses the subject of your conversation.
Never repeat information that is hard to explain or may be perceived as false, even if it is entirely true.
Treat everyone with respect, as if they were your superiors.
Be sincere about things that, if revealed, will neither harm nor benefit you. For example, be honest about genuine virtues that have been entrusted to you, rather than false ones.
Beware of conversing with those who show themselves venal and ready to commit any crime for you, because they will likely turn against you.
Avoid the furious and the desperate, as such interactions can be fraught with danger.
When interacting with rulers, always be concise; they prefer to be listened to rather than to listen. In these situations, be thoughtful and measured in your speech, rather than overly eloquent. Regardless of your familiarity with them, always show reverence.
Give the first seats to the elderly, submit to their admonitions, praise and revere them, for they readily accuse.
Praise and show respect to the boastful.
When dealing with the uneducated, try to understand their situation and mindset.
Limit your interactions with talkative people, those who have everything in their mouth.
Diligently praise what someone loves and ignore what he hates. Acting to the contrary, even unwittingly, will offend.
When interacting with individuals, act as if they were the only friend you have.
b2d4c0d @ 2024-05-27